An Open Letter to 20-Somethings: It’s OK to Be Single


OK, this one’s for all you single 20-somethings. Let me first start off by asking why are there articles out there titled, “How To Tell If A Guy Is Into You” or “X Ways To Tell If He Likes You.” Why do you trust the words of someone whom you have never met, someone who you don’t even know when deciding if the guy or girl you’re currently with is into you? Why do you need a numbered list on what to look for; shouldn’t it be obvious?

Think about it. Only you know what your standards are and how you feel towards this person. If you’re single, don’t let a random person on the internet tell you what you should be looking for. Actually, that might make me a hypocrite since I’m a random person on the internet telling you how to live. Take my advice, or don’t – I won’t be offended.

Here’s the truth: if a guy likes you more than a friend, you will know. Maybe it won’t be written on the walls, but it’s almost always obvious within their actions. We live in this society where “texting games” are the norm, and hiding how you feel deems you as “cool girl,” or “cool guy.” The truth is it might be fun sometimes, but it’s pretty pointless if you’re single and actually looking for a relationship. Why play games with someone if you have feelings for them? What’s the point? And vice versa, if you do not like the person, then please do them a favor and do not string them along.

It’s simple, really. Either a guy likes you or he doesn’t. He will either make an effort to talk to you or hang out with you, or he won’t respond. Why do those of us who are single obsess over small things such as this? In the grand scheme of life, there are so many other things to be worried about. We forget that we are only a tiny speck in this universe, so if that one guy or one girl you have feelings for doesn’t like you back, there are about seven billion others to choose from. Don’t worry.

Stop looking, and live. Stop worrying about rejection or the “what ifs” and chill out. Realize the difference between the act of being alone and the act of being lonely. I think I speak for single 20-somethings when I say we are currently living in such a weird point in our lives. Some of our friends are in healthy relationships, some are in destructive relationships, some of them have an undying love for hookup culture, and some are worried about other things in their lives other than finding love, despite being single.

At the end of the day, single or not, you should not be seeking outside approval when it comes to the feelings you do or do not have for someone. Do not waste your time with someone if you find yourself reading articles such as, “10 Ways To Tell If He Likes You,” because you and I both know you wouldn’t be reading that article unless you were unsure about your current situation.

Take a step back, take a deep breath and remember that although having someone by your side is a gratifying feeling, you shouldn’t drag it on if you find yourself doubting whatever “it” is 24/7. You’re 20-something years old, you have your whole life ahead of you. Go take a nap or something, and enjoy being single.