How to Fall Like a Rock Star

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Everyone falls at some point, but not everyone can fall like a rock star. No matter how hard you’re rocking your daily life, should you fall over, it’s not how you go down that matters, but how you get up. Please observe the following on stage rock star wipeouts for tips on how to fall (and rise) like a rock star.

Number One: Jack White. White was playing at on the Pyramid Stage at Glastonbury 2014, performing White Stripes songs, as well as songs from his two solo albums “Blunderbuss” and “Lazaretto.” In a fit of passion during “Seven Nation Army”, he threw away his guitar, knocked over the drummer, and fell into the drum set. The key here is that he stayed down, among the drums, lazily reaching up to one of his band mates to help pull him up. Then he generously welcomed the crowd’s cheers and applause for his rockin’ antics. Note to fallers: stay in character.

Number Two: Lady Gaga. Lady Gaga was at Monster Ball Live Montreal in 2009, which was part of the whole Monster Ball Tour. She just getting ready to start performing “Show Me Your Teeth” live when she slipped and landed smack on her rear. Amazingly enough she popped back up and continued the dance routine in step with her backup dancers. Please note that if you have a dance routine to complete, you have two choices: either incorporate the fall into your (most likely solo) choreography, or pick up where you left off like nothing happened.

Number Three: Beyonce. Now we enter our “down-the-steps” variety of falls, which Beyonce beautifully accomplished with the help of her Carmen San Diego style-coat made out of holiday-red wrapping paper. During her Beyonce Experience Tour in 2007, she was dressed in this material that tends to stick to the bottom of your heel – all the better to yank you face-first down the stairs. Be sure to order yours in time for this holiday season. After such a long tumble, the trick Beyonce uses here is to stay down, as if you intended to be there in the first place (see Jack White).

Number Four: Metallica. Once the wailing solo is complete, Metallica bassist Jason Newstead magnificently fell up the stairs, landed flat on his back, and again notice, he stayed down! When no choreography is present, your best response is to stay where you are, in your over-powered-by-passion character. You should be too immersed in your awesomeness to even notice gravity has gotten the better of you.

Number Five: Madonna. While performing “Like A Prayer” onstage in Dallas, Texas in 2012, Madonna bent down to lavishly touch hands with her fans. As she moved on to another section of the crowd, she fell face-forward onto the stage, from her crouched position but she rolled with it – quite literally. Lifting her legs into the air, she sensually danced on her back, then flipping over to her front hopped back up and continued strutting around the stage without missing a beat.

To recap, in order to fall like a rock star, you must (1) remain in character, fully immersed in the glory of your performance, (2) continue your routine without dropping a beat, just rolling with it, and (3) pick up where you left off, as if nothing unusual has happened because you meant to do that.

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