Dating as a member of the LGBT community isn’t always easy. However, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it! Dating is fun and exciting, but there are certain guidelines to follow to ensure you have the most positive and successful experience possible. Here, we present our list of the top 12 LGBT dating tips you need to know. Check them out for yourself below!
Number Twelve: Date Someone Who’s as Out as You Are
If you’re flamboyantly out of the closet, it’s important you find a partner who understands who you are and why you’re that way. If you begin dating someone who’s not completely out (or still in the closet), then chances are there will be tension sooner than you’d like.
Number Eleven: Don’t Spend Every Night Together
The first few months of dating can be a whirlwind – especially in the LGBT community. However, rather than jumping into bed with your prospective partner, try taking it a little slower. Spend time away from each other so you can do your own thing. You’ll enjoy the time you do spend with your partner that much more.
Number Ten: Always Offer to Pay in the Beginning
If you’re dating a same-sex partner, then it’s really important to establish a dynamic in the beginning. When the check arrives, don’t wait for your date to pull out his or her wallet first. Take yours out and have a conversation about it.
Number Nine: Don’t Talk About Your Ex
The LGBT community is growing every day, but it can still feel small. Because of this, there are a lot of tight-knit LGBT groups, even in big cities like New York. You never know who your partners might know (or who they’ve slept with) – including your ex. Bringing up your ex can open a can of worms that will end a first date faster than learning that they’re a Trump supporter.
Number Eight: Don’t Move in Together Right Away
We already mentioned the importance of not spending every night together, and this holds true for moving in together. In expensive cities like New York and San Francisco, it might make financial sense to move in together after six months; resist this urge. One of the best LGBT dating tips is to maintain your personal space for as long as it takes you to feel 100 percent sure of the relationship.
Number Seven: Put a Label on It
It can be difficult to label a relationship in the beginning, especially in the gay community. However, with the definition of “dating” become more and more fluid, it’s all the more important to make sure you and your partner are on the same page. Don’t go more than six successful dates without talking about where “this” is going and what “it” is.
Number Six: Turn Off Your Grindr Profile
It might sound obvious, but guys, turn off your Grindr profile before going on a first date! If the date goes really badly, you can turn it back on during dessert.
Number Five: Don’t Friend a First Date on Facebook
It can be tempting to add your date on Facebook to learn more about them before you meet in person. However, if the date doesn’t go well, you’re left with a Facebook friend you probably don’t want, and unfriending them can be awkward. Just prevent all of that awkwardness and wait to friend them until after you’re sure you like them.
Number Four: Figure Out What You Want
It’s not always easy to figure out what you want – especially if you’re a new member of the LGBT community. However, if you can’t answer basic questions like “Do you want to get married?” then you probably aren’t ready to seriously date. Sit down and get to know yourself before you try and date someone else.
Number Three: Avoid Controversial Conversation on the First Date
Conversations about politics and current events are very important, but they can also kill the mood. Avoid these conversations on the first date, even if you’re grasping at straws for other topics. If there’s chemistry, at least you have that.
Number Two: One of the Most Important LGBT Dating Tips – Focus on Foreplay
After a successful first date (and a few vodka sodas), it can be tempting to just jump into bed with that person. However, spend at least half an hour on foreplay. Foreplay is one of the best ways to get to know a person’s sexual personality without directly asking them and allows for a much more enjoyable experience when you actually do the deed.
Number One: Ask Questions
Finally, our number one tip on our list of LGBT dating tips is to ask questions. The LGBT community is big and open, but it also continues to be misunderstood in many ways. Truly get to know your date – their history, their preferences, etc. – before you start talking about yourself. Happy dating!