Can’t cook? Don’t worry. We’ve got your whole Thanksgiving dinner planned out for you.
Crashing on the couch is a Thanksgiving tradition, so the meal has to start with some “Red Red Wine” by UB40. But this time of year, I’m partial to “Cider,” so we’ll let Groundislava pour us some electronic goodness.
Starters for this evening include “Cranberry” by the Ruby Suns, paired with selections from indie pop rockers the Cranberries. Whether you like them with or without marshmallows, “Sweet Potato” by Sia and “My Sweet Potato” by Booker T. & The MG’s are sure to please. Booker T.’s funk legends also cooked up some “Soul Dressing” for us. The Beach Boys will remind you to eat your “Vegetables,” but you can choose between “Squash” by Telefunka and “Squash” by Townes Van Zandt.
Now, the moment we’ve all been waiting for, “Turkey” by Electro Deluxe! It’s cooked to a perfect “Golden Brown” by the Stranglers and“Stuffed” by Jaill. Get ready to fight over the “Legs” with ZZ Top. If you’re quick, you’ll get the “Hot Legs” from Rod Stewart. If not, you’ll have to settle on some “Cold Turkey” with John Lennon and the Plastic Ono Band.
There’s only one thing missing. Quincy Jones, pass the “Groovy Gravy”! I want “Gravy (For My Mashed Potatoes)” like Dee Dee Sharp, and I want to “Gravy Waltz” with Steve Allen.
Of course, not everyone is a turkey fan, so French electronic artist Mr. Oizo brought the “Ham” this year. Rapper Gorilla Zoe will definitely tell you to “Go Ham,” but according to the Wu-Tang Clan, it’s “Duck Seazon.”
For dessert, we’ll be Smashing Pumpkins and serving up American classics like “Cornbread” by Dave Matthews Band and “Applesauce” by Animal Collective. You can never have too much pie, so the Beatles brought “Honey Pie,” Led Zeppelin brought “Custard Pie,” Ray Charles and James Taylor brought “Sweet Potato Pie,” and Bob Dylan brought “Country Pie.”
When dinner’s done, wrap it all up with some “Cellophane” with Sara Jackson-Holman. Happy Thanksgiving from FDRMX!